Are you a good listener?
“A listener, who truly hears, is a gem. They will not only hear what you are saying, they will understand what you mean. There is nothing more frustrating than expending your energy on a long saga, only to find your audience distracted.”
Communication begins with good listening skills. An active listener is fully present in the situation, attending to the speaker’s body language and each word said. A passive listener on the other hand is wandering and preoccupied with self thoughts. The passive listener may be waiting to jump in at the earliest opportunity to say something about themselves or their point of view and in doing so, might completely miss what the other party has said.
Many people may believe that they are already good listeners. Take the test by answering the following questions:
While listening, are you thinking about the next question to ask?
While listening, are you thinking how to top what has just been said?
While listening, are you getting angry or judging what has been said?
While listening, are you switching off and thinking about something completely different?
Answering "yes" to the above questions indicates poor listening skills. Good listening creates good empathy, which is the first step to making good relationships.
How to Be a Good Listener:
Give attention- Make eye contact with the speaker. Listen keenly and let the speaker know that you are actually listening to him. You can speak phrases like ok, true, yes to show your interest. Ask questions; this shows that you are interested. Smiling helps too! Avoid crossing your arms since this can be interpreted as being closed off. If you're speaking with someone who's sitting, you should sit too. Standing over someone is too authoritative and may make the other person feel uncomfortable.
But why do all this - It gives the speaker a boost and further encourages explaining you better.
Do not interrupt- Take the time to listen – just relax and open your ears! A good speaker will give you an opportunity to speak once you have listened to him.
Empathize- When someone shares information with you, put yourself in his shoes. Doing this will allow the two of you to discover solutions more easily and will also help you appreciate a perspective different from your own.
Don’t change the subject- Changing the subject means that your attention is elsewhere or you are not interested in the conversation. This gives the impression that you give little importance to what the speaker has to say.
“A listener, who truly hears, is a gem. They will not only hear what you are saying, they will understand what you mean. There is nothing more frustrating than expending your energy on a long saga, only to find your audience distracted.”
Communication begins with good listening skills. An active listener is fully present in the situation, attending to the speaker’s body language and each word said. A passive listener on the other hand is wandering and preoccupied with self thoughts. The passive listener may be waiting to jump in at the earliest opportunity to say something about themselves or their point of view and in doing so, might completely miss what the other party has said.
Many people may believe that they are already good listeners. Take the test by answering the following questions:
While listening, are you thinking about the next question to ask?
While listening, are you thinking how to top what has just been said?
While listening, are you getting angry or judging what has been said?
While listening, are you switching off and thinking about something completely different?
Answering "yes" to the above questions indicates poor listening skills. Good listening creates good empathy, which is the first step to making good relationships.
How to Be a Good Listener:
Give attention- Make eye contact with the speaker. Listen keenly and let the speaker know that you are actually listening to him. You can speak phrases like ok, true, yes to show your interest. Ask questions; this shows that you are interested. Smiling helps too! Avoid crossing your arms since this can be interpreted as being closed off. If you're speaking with someone who's sitting, you should sit too. Standing over someone is too authoritative and may make the other person feel uncomfortable.
But why do all this - It gives the speaker a boost and further encourages explaining you better.
Do not interrupt- Take the time to listen – just relax and open your ears! A good speaker will give you an opportunity to speak once you have listened to him.
Empathize- When someone shares information with you, put yourself in his shoes. Doing this will allow the two of you to discover solutions more easily and will also help you appreciate a perspective different from your own.
Don’t change the subject- Changing the subject means that your attention is elsewhere or you are not interested in the conversation. This gives the impression that you give little importance to what the speaker has to say.
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